Vagi-Steam Herb Blend

Take a good look at this picture, as I will be referring back to it later.

Look at what I found on Etsy today…Vagi-Steam Herb Blend. Prepare yourself for this one because it’s a lou-lou.

The seller gives a huge description about this but it sure is some interesting reading:

Maya healers and midwives used bajos, an ancient healing practice. Bajos (ba-hoes) is a Spanish word that translates to Vaginal Steam Bath. Traditional Korean healers used this healing method as well, they call it chai-yok. Healers use the vagi-steam (vagina steam) to aid women with chronic fertility issues, as well as to maintain healthy fertility.

The steam from the herbal tea rises and absorbs into your skin & orifice. This steaming treatment stimulates the production of hormones to maintain uterine health, aids regular menstrual cycles, helps correct digestive disorders while soothing the nervous system. The natural antibiotic and anti-fungal properties are said to help maintain internal health as well as keeping your skin looking young. (Wait, this keeps your SKIN looking young? THAT skin needs to look young? Who knew?)

The combination of 14 different herbs work to nourish, tone, heal, bring in fresh oxygenated blood, promote cleansing, and make supple the vaginal and uterine tissues. The moist heat opens the pores of the tissues it comes into contact with. The water vapor carries the medicinal benefits of the plants, including volitile oils. This is absorbed into the tissues and enters the bloodstream, having a direct healing affect on the reproductive system. Vaginal tissue is one of the most absorbent of the entire female body.

Women who may benefit from vagi steam would be those with the following conditions: uterine fibroids, painful menstruation, uterine weakness, uterine prolapse, irregular menstrual cycles, ovarian cysts, endometriosis, reproductive adhesion/scar tissue, previous vaginal tear or episiotomy, and dark purple or brown blood at the onset or end of menses.

In some cases a woman should not do a vagi steam, these are: extremely heavy menstrual cycles, do not do during your period, if you have a vaginal infection, open wounds, sores, or blisters, do not do if you are pregnant or think you may be pregnant. 

Then she tells us how do do our very own Vagi-Steam treatment at home, because “spas across the US charge a pretty penny for this treatment.” (30 mins for $50-75! Whaaattt?) Please refer back to the picture at the beginning of this post and note the chair in the background in order to give yourself a visual.

How to do a Traditional Vagi-Steam:
You need a slatted chair or modified stool/chair to let steam through. Preferably made of natural materials such as wood, canvas, or bamboo. And a large stainless steel stock pot, large enough to boil a gallon of water. You also can use two chairs (just simple dining room chairs or such) and you place the steaming pot between the two chairs and then you sit down with one “cheek” on each chair.
Boil 1 gallon of water with 1 cup (about 25 g) of Vagi-Steam Herb Blend for 10 minutes. Continue to steep off of the stove for an additional 5 minutes. Place pot or bowl under the chair/stool. Test how hot the steam is. Put the inside of your forearm over the steam to test. Remember your genitals are very sensitive to heat, you do not want to burn them! Do not sit down until the steam is comfortable for you. Sit down. Be sure you are not wearing underwear and none of your clothing is hanging in the pot. Cover your entire lower half, all the way to the ground with a blanket. Wrap another blanket around the upper half of your body. Keep it wrapped around you, stay warm. Steam for 20-30 minutes. Keep warm, go to bed for 1 hour.
Be careful over the next 24 hours to protect your entire body from cold drafts, keep warm and avoid any sudden temperature changes.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t want hot steam anywhere near my nether region. Imagine getting that burned? Sweet Mother of Pearl, that would HURT! Explain that one at the Emergency Room. You’ll make their Hall of Fame, I promise. Also, how many people have a chair with a hole cut in the middle lying around the house? If you don’t,  you’ll have to construct one and really make sure that mother is sanded down to perfection, because the last thing you need is a splinter by your who-ha, am I right? She does say you can use a slatted chair, but I don’t think that would have the same effect as the chair with the open hole in it. If you’re going to do it, do it right! Another question I have is what season of the year do you think it’d be best to do this, after all of the “avoid sudden temperature change, keep warm” warnings? This would take some serious planning, and I don’t know about you, but I don’t have that kind of time.

If you are interested in getting yourself some Vagi-Steam, color yourself lucky  because August is buy 2, get 1 free month! That’s right…if you buy two at $17.95 each, you get a third one for free. That’s a whole lot of Vagi-Steaming! If you decide to try it,  good luck with that. Personally, I’m out.

Vagi-Steam Herb Blend…That’s Shitsy! (and has potential to be quite painful if done hastily!)

PS – I really think we all learned a little something new today. You’re welcome! Carry on!



Filed under That's Shitsy!

4 responses to “Vagi-Steam Herb Blend

  1. Bug

    OMG I thought this was some sort of ‘lost in translation’ brandname from the photo. Did not expect it was an actual vaginal steam thing. Jesus.

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