Tag Archives: Christmas Shopping

Cat Pajamas


catpjs

Look at what I found on Etsy today…Cat Pajamas!  Coolcats Polkadot Fleece Pajamas, to be exact.

In case you’re new to my blog, I have a fascination with the things people will buy for their cats. (Examples include “Your Cat Hates This Shitsy Tie, Cat Toy Tampon, and The Desktop Cat Seat…just to name a few.) I just do not get some of the things “cat people” really think their pets  need.  (I say “pets” because lots of cat people have more than one. No offense cat owners, it’s just my personal observation.)

Anyway…

Let me tell you a little something…I don’t think your cat wants to wear pajamas. I think this would be a total sensory overload for it. Would someone make this a nightly ritual?  “Hey Mr. Meow Meow…it’s jammy time!” I think it’ll take off like a bat out of hell once it catches on to that sentence. Besides, how cold is your cat really going to get? Seriously. There’s a ton of stray cats in my neighborhood, (Thanks a lot jerk neighbor who just keeps feeding them!) and they seem to survive the Jersey climate just fine without wearing pajamas! Your cat would be in your house! Your house has heat, doesn’t it? Your cat really needs to toughen the hell up! If it accidentally gets out,  it’ll never make it. It is going to get it’s ass kicked by the neighborhood strays, and you’ll only have yourself to blame because of things like this!

Well, if you think your cat just has to have these, ( He doesn’t. I’m telling you.)  then pussy-foot on over to Etsy, plunk down $24, and you’ll be dressing your angry, yowling cat just in time for Christmas! I suggest only attempting that with a de-clawed cat, but do what you want….it’s your cat  (and skin), not mine.

Cat Fleece Pajamas…I really, really don’t get it…therefore, That’s Shitsy!

PS- The generic footer on my blog is “This WordPress site is the cat’s pajamas”. Well, now it really is!

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No More Panty Lines


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Cyber Monday Alert for the ladies…Strapless panties.  (Yeah, that’s a new one by me too!)

Apparently it sticks to your lady parts via adhesive, so you don’t have unsightly panty lines, noticeable swamp ass, or the dreaded whale tail.

I’m just going to let you read a review before I post my own thoughts on this…

Basically, the Shibue Strapless Panty was really easy to put on. You stick on the front, and then the back. I have really sensitive skin, so I was worried the adhesive would bother it, but it never did. The panty ended up being quite comfortable. I was also worried that going to the bathroom would be a pain, but it was very easy to get the panty off and back on again. I was quite surprised with how well it actually worked. However, it seemed to start to not re-apply well when doing anything that caused a good amount of sweating, so I wouldn’t recommend them for any really active activity where you’re going to be sweating a lot. You can get it to re-apply in that case, by drying off the area first, but if you’re going to be continually sweating, it can be a bit of a hassle.

Overall, I think the Shibue Couture Strapless Panty is a great alternative for women who don’t want panty lines, or would otherwise go without panties altogether. It’s really easy to use, and re-usable, and is great for any occasion where panty lines are an issue.

Now…a few things here…

#1. I don’t care what this lady says…adhesive stuck to your lady parts cannot be all that comfortable….and I have a hard time believing it peels off as gently and easily as advertised.

#2.  It’s washable and reusable? How the heck is there any adhesive left once you wash it? Is the adhesive actually velcro-like? Now that really can’t be comfortable!

#3.  If you get sweaty, it doesn’t work as well. OK,  sweatiness is a no go, but you can wash it and it still works? Huh?

Here’s my take…either put on a thong or go commando. Either of those has to be better than this.

I don’t know about the rest of you ladies, but I’m not really down with this.

However, if this is something you’re interested in because you would like adhesive stuck to your lady parts, then by all means head over to Shibue and order yours for $15…or you can head over to Amazon and get a whole big multi-pack that also includes pasties for between $30-$150.

Shibue Strapless Panties…I just can’t bring myself to call you an Internet Score.

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Santa Claus Lycra Spandex Suit


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Would you like to put an image in children’s minds that would possibly scar them forever? Perhaps a really bratty niece or nephew? How about that annoying neighborhood kid that gets under your skin all year long? (There’s always one!)

Do you have some sweet paunch that could fill this out in a horrific manner? (I mean, really…who do you know that could perfectly fill this out?)

Do you want to absolutely destroy the upcoming Christmas party you really don’t even want to go to?

Do you not mind lycra vacuum sealed across your face?  (It is a good idea to disguise your face if you’re going to wear this!)

If you answered yes to any of the aforementioned queries, or came up with your own reason (I won’t judge!), then hustle your holly jolly ass over to milanoo.com, and for $52.99, you’ll be able to  squeeze yourself into this bad boy before you know it! (If you do, can you please send pics so I can enjoy your brazenness!) By the way, it’s unisex. (Seriously ladies…NO! Let the men poorly rock this!)

Santa Claus Lycra Spandex Suit…total Internet Score!!

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Chicken Christmas Sweater


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Look at what I found on Etsy today…a homemade crocheted Chicken Christmas Sweater! If you’ve been here before,then you know I have a small fascination with the things people come up with to crotchet. This is one I have never seen before! A Chicken Sweater? With a Christmas theme? Chickens need themed sweaters?!? Am I missing something here?

Now I tried to rationalize this in my mind as I sat and stared at it, but I couldn’t. Do chickens really get that cold? I live at the shore and know basically zero about chickens, but I have my doubts here. (If any of you know differently about this and would like to school me, please do!)  I look at this picture and picture someone ridiculously trying to “wrassle” their chicken into this while it squawks like it’s being killed for Sunday dinner.  Also,I notice this chicken in said sweater is on a table in the house. Is this normal chicken owning behavior?? People let chickens roam free in their homes? They’re not potty trained!!!  If so, why does the chicken even need a sweater? It’s inside where it’s warm, right? Sigh. I don’t get any of this!!

I bet you’re wondering what the top looks like, aren’t you? Well, here you go:

chicken2Apparently it snaps nicely around the chicken’s body for easy on, easy off.

If you’re in the market for a Chicken Christmas Sweater,then hustle on over to Etsy and snap this up because there’s only one in stock.  It retails for $17, which I guess is a good deal. (Truthfully, I have no idea what a Chicken Sweater should cost!)

Maybe this is something someone would like or find useful,but I’d be 100% lying if I said I fit into that category of people(or knew anyone who did), therefore…

Chicken Christmas Sweater…That’s Shitsy!

 

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Reason #1,345,872 That I Don’t Shop On Black Friday…


Courtesy of  News4  New York:

*What Had Happened Was…People are animals…

Black-Friday-Crowd

Shopper Pepper Sprayed, Arrested in Argument Over TV at New Jersey Walmart

Huge crowds turned out to get an early start on Black Friday shopping

A 29-year-old shopper was arrested Thursday in a New Jersey Walmart after arguing with a store manager about a TV and attacking an officer, police said.

Richard Ramos of Newark was charged with disorderly conduct, aggravated assault on a police officer and resisting arrest, according to Garfield police.

Police working at the store on the busy shopping day were dealing with a separate altercation, where a woman in the infant section spit on another woman’s child. While issuing that suspect a summons, they heard a man nearby shouting obscenities.

When they tracked down the man, store security asked the officers to make the man to leave, police say.They tried to escort the man out, but he spun around and grabbed an officer’s shirt. As police tried to handcuff the suspect, he continued to struggle. According to the Star-Ledger, police eventually had to use pepper spray to subdue the man.

Ramos is scheduled to appear in court Friday, police said. It’s not known if he has an attorney. He’s being held at a Bergen County jail in lieu of $10,000 bail.

Spitting on a child…the lowest form of low…and a great way to have your teeth knocked out!

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Chimney Jesus


chimney1It’s that time of year again, my friends! Black Friday starts my tips for “interesting” Christmas gifts. With the winners I find, the chances of you having to worry about someone receiving doubles of your gift are slim. Hell, throw out the gift receipt…they’re not going to need it…and besides, with the awesomeness you’ll be betrothing upon your friends and loved ones, they would NEVER dare think of returning it! (At least with you knowing!)

So, without further ado, I bring you the first of many spectacular gifting possibilities…Chimney Jesus!

Do you want to screw up your children’s idea of Christmas by crossing stories?

Do you want people to remember the “real reason for the season”?

Are you “not exactly” religious, like me?

Are you looking to offend your ultra religious friends?

Are you just a total heathen?

If you answered yes to any of the above, then head on over to Zazzle.com and shop to your heart’s delight, because they have everything “Chimney Jesus”!

Here’s just a few examples:

You can start simple for a great deal...just $1 for Chimney Jesus cards!

You can start simple for a great deal…just $1 for Chimney Jesus cards!

Chimney Jesus onesies for the baby! $26.95

Chimney Jesus onesies for the baby! $26.95

Chimney Jesus binder for your holiday picture memories! $21.95

Chimney Jesus binder for your holiday picture memories! $21.95

Chimney Jesus Napkins- $50.95 for a set of four. (OK, that's a little ridiculous!)

Chimney Jesus Napkins- $50.95 for a set of four. (OK, that’s a little ridiculous!)

and finally, for those of you with money to burn:

Chimney Jesus stretch canvas print - $158.95

Chimney Jesus stretch canvas print – $158.95

I could go on and on, because there’s tons more Chimney Jesus items…like water bottles, outfits for your dog, phone cases, mugs, etc…but you can just head on over to Zazzle.com and peruse on your own!

Chimney Jesus…the first of many great gift ideas!

Stop back (or subscribe to my blog…hint,hint) for other gift ideas to wow your family and friends with between now and Christmas! I’ll take good care of you. Promise!

 

 

 

 

 

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Poo-Pourri Spray – Girls Don’t Poop


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There are about a million things I could say about this product, or you can just head over to Poo-pourri and check this all out for yourself!  Click on the video, and kick back for perhaps the greatest commercial ever….and no, it’s not a joke! Prices range from $25-$58 each depending on which package you choose and come with a stink-free guarantee.

Poo-Pourri…That’s Shitsy…just like they want it to be!

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